75 Ninth Avenue
New York, NY 10011
Smack on the border between Chelsea and the Meatpacking District is the Chelsea Market. Goodbye sketchiness, hello boutiques. Goodbye smack-craving tranny hookers on a corner, hello eye-candy escorts at the Gansevoort. Goodbye industrial slaughterhouse, hello restaurant. Goodbye blue collar workers, hello tourists. In keeping with the food theme that the area has become a home to, Chelsea Market has emerged to be essentially a mall for eating things (mostly). From fruit to bread to fish to restaurants that sell dresses to gelato (my next post), Chelsea Market is one big, mostly overpriced gastronomic hub. Among these is the Fat Witch Bakery, a brownie-centric chocolate-lover's paradise.
Fat Witch bakes all of its goodies on the premises, so you can rest assured that they're fresh. None of that Entenmann's stuff that could be a week old by the time you pick it up at the supermarket. Fat Witch's specialty brownies aside, they have about ten standards. I bought six to try. Some were good, but others were less than impressive.
Fat Witch: Dark and moist and heavy on the fudge. A little too dry to be great, but nonetheless a well-above average brownie.
Blonde Witch: This is basically a very thick chocolate chip cookie. It was dryer than it should be and sort of tasteless. If you really want something chocolate chip, go with a standard cookie.
Caramel Witch: This is like the Fat Witch, but with a thin layer of gooey caramel inside it. You almost don't notice it unless you're looking for it. It's not bad, but I preferred the plain one.
Red Witch: The cherry-flavored brownie is only subtly cherried. Once or twice you'll get a burst of cherry flavor, which is nice, but between those two bursts it's just a normal brownie.
Java Witch: If I wasn't told by the wrapper that this was a coffee-flavored brownie, I wouldn't have known. Still this is their best one. It was the most moist and the most rich. The coffee didn't replace the chocolate, so much as enhance it. If you can only get one Fat Witch brownie, get this one.
Breakfast Witch: Yecch. Awful. Gritty and mealy and dry. It's supposed to be like an oatmeal brownie. I like oatmeal and oatmeal raisin cookies, but this one just isn't the same or worth the money.
Brownies average $3 each.