LE GRAINNE CAFE

LE GRAINNE CAFE

183 Ninth Avenue
New York, NY 10011
(646) 486-3000

Le Grainne Cafe is where I'd go with Speeds when we were craving comfort food. Of course, we're atypical and craved French comfort food. There are very few places I can think of that create a perfect atmosphere. Very few places where you can eat alone, at a table reading the newspaper, without feeling like a total loser. Very few places where you can feel just as comfortable showing up right after work wearing a tie as you'd be having just rolled out of bed after an early evening nap in jeans and yesterday's t-shirt. And yet such a place exists. And it's in Chelsea.



Le Grainne Cafe, for me, was all about the Coq Au Vin. I have never had such good coq au vin and it would appear that I might not get the chance again. When Speeds and Dogz showed up for the first meal we'd had together in a few weeks, I hadn't even bothered looking at the menu. They arrived at the corner table in the back I had snagged to see me with a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc one glass lighter than it had been ten minutes prior and a closed menu. Had I opened said menu, I'd have discovered, to my horror, that the precious coq au vin was gone. Our smoking hot waitress (with the French accent that made her even more smoking hot) let me know that there weren't enough people ordering it and that, come fall, it was maybe slated to be a special every now and again. "Shit..." came my reply.

Le Grainne, if you ever read this (ha!), bring back the coq au vin!



What we did order, however, was fantastic nonetheless and I will therefore still recommend Le Grainne Cafe as one of the best restaurants in the city, especially for the money. We got, once we decided what we wanted to eat, a loaf of "kickass bread" to borrow Speeds' description, and we proceeded to pound back the wine like it was vodka shots at a college party. On an empty stomach, this can prove be a problem, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

Dogz and I ordered Cream of Asparagus Soup to start. I've always loved cream soups and always loved asparagus. Combine them and you normally find a little bit o' heaven. This soup would prove to be no exception. Speeds skipped the appetizers.



Each entree we ordered was excellent. Dogz went for Le Merguez a la Moutarde Forte, a warm, spicy lamb sandwich on a toasted baguette. Speeds ordered the Crepe Maison, a crepe that came with her choice of three fillings from a list of fifteen. She filled it with goat cheese, chicken and mushroom. I tried a bite from each of their meals so I can attest to the alleged excellenticity. My choice, given the smacking down of my initial want, was Le Poulet Roti, roast chicken with a side of string beans and mashed potatoes. A culinarily boring choice, but it tasted great. And besides, we were here for comfort food.

Given that I had just seen a certain Pixar film, that if it convinced me of nothing else convinced me to open up a French bistro, I ordered a side of Ratatouille, something I'd never had before. I thought it tasted pretty good for roasted mixed veggies. Mr. Dogz went so far as to state that it was so good it eclipsed his mother's ratatouille. Though to be fair... she's not French.



By the time it came to order dessert we were well into bottle number two and were well on our way to being pretty hammered. Especially Speeds, who was a lighter weight than I had thought. And yet we ordered anyway. Mr. Dogz got the Orange Caramel Crepe Sucree, Speeds picked the Fondant Chocolat, which is her usual, a chocolate lava cake. Boring. I mean, it tasted good, but how many times in a row can you order a chocolate cake? Variety, people. Variety. I ordered the Raspberry Confiture, a raspberry jam-filled crepe. As the only person to have tried all three desserts, and the only one to have tried Speeds', I can attest to how good they all were.

Alas, we did not get to finish. The only way to avoid having a certain female someone heave all over the table was to rush her home. I know what you're thinking. The bathroom was unavailable. We tossed down a credit card, I wolfed down a few bites of everyone's food as we got up, I sucked down my remaining coffee, and we went outside to wander embarrassedly home.



Two bottles of wine, two soups, a side dish, three entrees, three desserts, and two coffees, plus tax and tip weighed in at $185.50.

UPDATE: 4/4/09

So I went back with Speeds to Le Grainne the other night and we ordered a bunch of things, but none of them I hadn't had before here. Except for the Escargot. Ahhh, escargot. Is anything better than soft, creamy meat covered in garlic and pesto and soaking in butter? Is that a resounding "no" I hear coming from the audience? Le Grainne's escargot are still in the shell and extremely good. But they're a wee bit small. Grab some bread to soak up the garlic butter and you won't notice.

The escargot was about $10.

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ESS-A-BAGEL

ESS-A-BAGEL
831 Third Avenue
New York, NY 10022
(212) 980-1010

Everyone in New York City lives right down the block from the best bagel place in the city. It doesn't matter what neighborhood you live in, your neighborhood has the best one. Ess-A-Bagel is one of those places. These days, my primo pick is Gotta Getta Bagel on Continental Avenue, but growing up it was Ess-A-Bagel. Why? Because they had a store right down the block. Obviously. And because it was damn good. Amongst my friends there was a debate (argument) over which bagel was better, an Ess-A-Bagel bagel or an H&H bagel. To this day, I've never knowingly had an H&H bagel. But to my credit, I don't remember participating in the argument.

Getting off the subway in midtown, I walk past Ess-A-Bagel every day. The lines alone are enough to keep me on the sidewalk. The first time I went into this one (as opposed to the one downtown) was during the recent, massive rainstorm that flooded out the subways citywide. I hopped on the LIRR and walked east from Penn Station and by the time I got even close to work, I figured that I was already so late that a few more minutes couldn't possibly matter. Even with the line shorter than the norm, it took a while. But in the end, it was definitely worth it.

Ess-A-Bagel has massive bagels. They're larger than the standard NYC bagel, and the standard NYC bagel, for those of you from out of town, make the supermarket/Lenders ones look like a free sample and taste like a rough draft. The variety of cream cheeses is where Ess-A-Bagel really stands out. Sure there's the standard regular and low-fat versions, along with the vegetarian, smoked salmon, and scallion varieties. And of course they have my favorite, the maple walnut. But they also have chocolate chip, which is like turning your breakfast into dessert. Spread some on a cinnamon-raisin bagel and you'll be on a sugar high lasting longer than your coffee's caffiene buzz. More on the coffee later. I recently tried their strawberry and blueberry cream cheeses and while the strawberry one was okay, the blueberry is the one I recommend. There are even a variety of tofu-based cream cheeses. I think it's somewhat sacreligious, but I'm far from the most pious guy in the pew.



Ess-A-Bagel also has lots of other deli-ish items. Lots. The list would be as long as my arm, but suffice it to say, chiken salads and egg salads are but the tip of the iceberg. Pickled tomatoes are thankfully buried under tons of ice and seawater.

But now the downsides: I already mentioned the line, which would put Six Flags to shame. But the service is slow. Add the two together and you'll find me down the block at Starbucks, which knows how to move its customers through. Like it or not, I have places to be that aren't on line. Additionally, and this is my own thing that no one need agree with, the everything bagel only has "everything" on one side. I like mine coated from head to toe in all that everything (the way Gotta Getta Bagel does it). And finally, the coffee. It's awful. When it's iced, you don't notice it. But when it's hot, man, it tastes like Maxwell House reject beans filtered through a sock.

I grew up down the street from the original Ess-A-Bagel on First Avenue. But the two locations are not clones. The midtown Ess-A-Bagel has plenty of space, albeit the wrought iron chairs weigh a ton and screech when you move them; the east 20s Ess-A-Bagel is tight. The midtown one is more lunch friendly; the east 20s one is, for all intents and purposes, breakfast only. The midtown one will toast your bagel. For some reason (I can only attribute a lack of counter space) the east 20s one won't.

Under four bucks for a huge bagel laden with cream cheese is one of the best values in Manhattan. It's not as healthy as a Pax salad next door, but it costs less than half the price.

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Q

Q HAS CLOSED.

Q, a THAI BISTRO
108-25 Ascan Avenue
Forest Hills, NY 11375
(718) 261-6599

There were a number of reasons I picked Forest Hills when I moved from Manhattan. First, the price. Second, the express subways (having the LIRR as a rainy-day back-up's nice, too). Third, the Banana Republic and the Barnes & Noble. Fourth, the Starbuckses. And of course, fourth, the numerous restaurants that weren't all Greek.

Although there are many restaurants here, and many good ones, there are only about a half-dozen or so which are truly great and could entice a Manhattanite down from his hill. Q is in that shortlist.



Whenever friends visit me, especially if they don't drive, I push Q as a dining option. It's hard enough getting people to travel here, so when they come, I want them to want to return. The only downside to Q is that it's one of the more expensive, if not the most expensive, Forest Hills haunts.

Q calls itself Thai, and it's certainly pretty close. But if you want real Thai, I'd head west down Austin Street until you find Bann Thai. Q is more European-influenced. And that's good. Anyone who thinks that they'll be getting the sort of food here that will remind them of their year teaching English in Bangkok after college while trying to figure what to do with their life will be sorely disappointed.

The walls of Q are far from empty. Photos of famous customers and magazine reviews line the front, followed by a massive Twister board mounted to the wall (I have no idea what the significance of the twister board is, but it clearly influenced their business card). Palm trees with green mini-bulbs, jazz music, dim mood lighting, and ceiling fans a la Raiders of the Lost Ark set the atmosphere. Spies could eat here. In the back is the open kitchen where you can watch the chefs prepare your food and occasionally distract you as huge explosions of orange flame burst from their pans.

Day One:
Bro wasn't very hungry and neither was I, but we wanted something and we wanted that something out of our respective apartments. We figured on Q as a good option since it's only a ten minute walk away. At this time, a Sunday at 8:45 PM, there was almost no one there. A few people at the bar and a couple of couples in the back. We sat by the window so I could get a good camera angle and I ordered a glass of pinot grigio.

Since we weren't very hungry, we only ordered one thing each. Bro got the Steamed Dumpling appetizer. It was large enough to be a teeny meal in and of itself and came with a little side salad. Bro liked it but I didn't get to try it. It seemed like a jerk move to grab a bit of someone's food when all they got was an appetizer.

I chose the Chicken Pad Si Eau, a stir fried noodle dish, very similar to drunken noodles crossed with pad thai. At first, for some reason, I wasn't impressed. But after a few bites it grew on me. Next thing I know, I looked down and I'm rubbing the sauce up with my finger. "You missed a noodle," Bro was kind enough to point out. Not anymore, says I as I ate it. I'm getting this again.

We decided to get dessert and coffees. I neglected to write down the names of the desserts and can't find the dessert menu online, but if you take a look-see at the photo I can point things out. I got the the chocolate cake dessert on top. It's ultra-super-rich. A chocolate-lovers dream come true. And Bro picked the lower one, which looks like cheesecake, but is actually a tropical fruit tart. Like a key lime pie with passion fruit and mango instead. It tasted like a fruity explosion. Negative dessert comment: I ordered a refill on my coffee, and got charged a second time. I mean seriously, who does that?

This meal, which was pretty small, an appetizer, an entree, a glass of wine, three coffees, and two desserts, plus tax and tip, broke the bank at $65.19.

Day Two:
A few days later, I got off work late and got a call from Bro. He was heading back from Manhattan and wanted to know if I was up for grabbing dinner. I suggested another round at Q, and we agreed to meet up. I hoped the kitchen would still be open by the time we both arrived, which ended up being at around 9:45PM. But it was and we were greeted by someone, who I'm guessing is the owner, sitting at the bar chatting it up with her friends or regulars. One of the tables in the back was occupied and someone took our window seat from the last time. But other than that, there was plenty of space. There's something about going to a restaurant late and being one of the only people there but not feeling like you're being rushed out that I absolutely love. Jazz music playing overhead added to the chillness of the atmosphere.

Our one mistake was ordering wine. Neither or us were in the mood for it, and honestly, a diet Pepsi would have been perfectly fine. But we did, partly because Q fancies itself a wine bar. That's a stretch. But I can see how the mood can give that impression. So consider this your warning, two glasses of pinot noir (I didn't look at the wine list, I just asked if they had pinot noir) set us back $24.

On to the appetizers. Bro got the Chicken Satay, skewered thin strips of grilled chicken with a peanut sauce. Satay is something that any good Thai restaurant needs. I don't know how traditional it is, but along with Pad Thai is one of those signature Thai dishes that have to exist on every menu to lure in those who aren't keen on ordering anything new. Bro liked the satay, but I thought it was a little tough and too bland for my taste. My choice was the Chicken Coconut Soup, with lemongrass, mushroom, and scallion. Q makes one of the best, if not the best version of the Thom Ka Kai soup. It's very sweet, with a spiciness that's just strong enough to get your nose to run a little.

For entrees, Bro and I stuck with beef dishes to at least keep our recent red wine idiocy from being a total waste. Bro chose the Stir Fry with Filet Mignon. This was your standard stir fry dish with beef and vegetables (only better), but the beef was of a noticeably higher quality. The cubed filet mignon was very tender, with a little more spice than Bro would have liked, but barely spicy by my standards. For some reason that I could never quite grasp, Bro doesn't like mushrooms, meaning a little pile of them appeared on my plate when I wasn't looking. A little wicker basket of white rice comes with the dish.

My choice was the Beef Drunken Noodles. This was delicious and I'm absolutely recommending it. It was allegedly spicy from garlic and chili, but I have a high tolerance and can't really say that it was terribly potent, though I can say that there was certainly a bit of burn. Of course, it was gone damn quick.

Our two glasses of wine, two appetizers, two entrees, plus tax and tip (no dessert) clocked in at a hefty $97.00 even.

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PUNCH

PUNCH

913 Broadway
New York, NY 10010
(212) 673-6333

Punch was one of those places that I always walked past but never went to. It wasn't really until Hottydoc suggested it this past Spring as a place I'd like that I finally got a chance to check it out. And ever since, I'd wanted to return. Punch has a certain cool flair that I think will make it one of my go-to places for a relaxed, hip dinner that doesn't break the bank and will surround me with the professional, yet unpretentious types that I like being surrounded by. I could comfortably eat here in a tie or jeans and finding the kind of place that successfully straddles that middle ground is hard to come by.

My return trips to Punch involved first Mr. Dogz and Speeds, and then M a week or so later.



Trip One: I initially did not have plans to meet Mr. Dogz or Speeds for dinner. As luck would have it, they were out already and I was asked if I was busy. I kinda was, but they waited patiently and hungrily. A brisk walk from Midtown to Madison Square Park later, we were en route to Punch. It was close, we were hungry, I had it on my list.

Punch has two dining areas, separated by the bar. In the back is the regular restaurant which will take a reservation and will fill up if you don't have one. In the front, by the window that's left open like a humongous door in the Summer is first-come-first-served. There was a table in the front and we grabbed it. I actually prefer sitting here. It's more laid back. Wicker chairs and small round tables give it a European bistro flair. Along the southern wall is placed twisted vines that ladder their way to the ceiling. Add the plants and sitting here almost (but not quite) gives the illusion that you're in one of the rear patios that so many Brooklyn restaurants have. Also, upstairs is their wine bar, Wined Up. One day I'll go, but I haven't yet.

We started with drinks. A beer for Dogz, a sangria for Speeds, and a 7&7 for me. It wasn't until the important part was out of the way that we looked at the menu. Dogz wasn't as famished as the rest of us, so he skipped an appetizer. Not to worry though, since Speeds didn't want half of hers and donated it to him. What she chose was the Maine Crab and Avocado Spring Rolls. They came with a tuna sashimi which you're supposed to eat together with the rolls, and having tried a sample of her appetizer the way it was meant to be, I can attest that it's pretty good. But this is the thing. Other than shrimp, Speeds doesn't like fish (note to self: see if she considers Arthur Treacher's "fish".) Beyond not liking fish, she most certainly doesn't like sushi or it's carb-free cousin, sashimi. Dogz does. Notwithstanding the fact that it was meant to be eaten with the rolls, he felt it was pretty tasteless. I agreed, but it was supposed to be eaten with the rolls after all. I went for what I feel I've been ordering like it's going out of style, the Crispy Long Island Duck Leg Confit. It was very good. It was also not very different from the others I've had of late. Crispy duck leg served over a small but yummy salad. It was actually pretty large and could have been a good lunch or maybe an entree for an aspiring Calvin Klein model. Speeds felt the urge to order a basket of Sweet Potato Fries, too. They were very good.

Having just had crispy duck, and not wanting to too radically alter my palatte, I chose the Crispy Skin Half Chicken for my entree, which came with a water chestnut and romaine salad. It's hard to go wrong with a roast chicken dish. So many restaurants make it for people like me who don't want to pay very much or think very hard, and so few botch it that it's a natural choice for one's first meal. I can't really think of much to say about this entree other than that that Punch didn't botch it. It wasn't too salty or dry and was overall very satisfying. Of course, I was into my second cocktail at this point. So you should go there and test it for yourself.

Dogz, keepin' it cheap, got the Punch Burger, no cheese. And Speeds (I groan as I write this) chose the Ceasar Salad... with nothing. Like, literally telling the waitress to have it made with half the ingredients it normally would come with. "So you want lettuce with dressing." I said to a dirty look.

We sat until the place was virtually deserted shot the breeze. Our meals, which included three entrees, a side dish, two appetizers, and I forget how many drinks, came to $130, including tax and tip.



Trip Two: I arrived at Punch on time, but M, forgetting the time, was still in Brooklyn. So I had some time to kill. I killed it with a Bass Ale and a crossword puzzle. Punch was packed. Luckily for me, there was a table of eight or nine people in the first-come-first-served section and they had stolen a chair from a nearby table. Almost no one eats alone, so I grabbed the table with the lonely seat and a waitress and waited patiently. Eventually some of the party left and I recovered the missing chair. By the way, large kudos go out to Punch for not telling me to order more than a beer or leave. I sat there for almost an hour by myself nursing that Bass and no one gave me so much as a dirty look. They even kept refilling my water glass. Many other places would not have been so good. I, naturally, would keep you in the loop as to their douche-bagginess... not to be crude.

When M finally showed up, we started with the Roasted Grilled Corn and Polenta Hush Puppies. This was an appetizer I could have done without. Very dry and pretty tasteless. I'm not much of a hush puppy person to begin with, but these were sadly pretty bad. M had read on MenuPages the reviews of customers who really liked the hush puppies and that was why she picked them out. "Maybe they came on a good night," she postulated.

One thing about Punch this day, contrary to my previous excursion here. It was loud. Not normal loud, but clubbing loud. "Hey can you hear me" loud. "Say that again" loud. "Eh, what" loud. "Look at my lips when I'm talking" loud. The waitress couldn't hear me. I thought she wanted to know if I wanted a bottle of red; she was asking if I wanted a basket of bread. Speaking of which, the bread was pretty good and came with a large slab of peppered butter.

M's a vegetarian who eats fish. A pescatarian, to use a term I learned from one of M's vegetarian-but-not-really friends. So she ordered the Seared Scallops with Summer Farro Risotto. I hate scallops, so I'd never order them. Luckily for y'all, I know people who do. She wiped these out. Loved 'em. I wanted to order something she could try, and ordered the Roasted Chatham Cod. Punch's menu, it should be noted, is very fish heavy. This is good if you like fish, and less good if you don't. I do. Generally. I didn't, in this case, particularly care much for my cod. Cod's kinda bland to begin with, and this was far from the exception. The truffled potato puree (or as I like to call it, mashed potatoes) and browned radishes that it rested on, were very good, but in the end, it was a boring entree.

I paid for our last meal out, so it was M's turn. Two entrees, an appetizer, and three beers totalled $70.99, tax included, plus tip. Ginger candy came with the bill.

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